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Two Crocodiles were sitting by the side of the swamp near the river.The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, “I can’t understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We’re the same age. We were the same size as kids. I just don’t get it.”


“Well,” said the big Croc, “What have you been eating?”


“Generals, same as you,” replied the small Croc.


“Hmm. Well, where do you catch them?”


“Down the other side of the swamp near the parking lot by the HQ Building.”


“Same here. Hmm. How do you catch them?”


“Well, I crawl up under one of their staff cars and wait for one to

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Once a Minister went to the Mental Asylum to see the condition of the people kept there. He saw that some had gone from bad to worse and some were improving. After inspecting some he came to a corner and saw Banta, who was sitting rather quietly.

He went to him and asked him, “How are you ?”

Banta calmly replied, “I am fine, what about you Sir”.

The Minister was quite surprised at the reply. The Minister asked him many questions about General knowledge and to his surprise Banta answered them all right.

The surprised Minister told him, “You dont seem to be mad then why are you kept here.”

Banta replied, “Even I’m unable to under

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A teacher asks the class to name things that end with ‘tor’ that eat things.


The first little boy says, “Alligator.”


“Very good, that’s a big word.”


The second boy says, “Predator.”


“Yes, that’s another big word. Well done.”


Little Johnny says, “Vibrator, Miss.”


After nearly falling off her chair, she says, “That is a big word, but it doesn’t eat anything.”


“Well my sister has one and she says it eats f*cking batteries like there’s no tomorrow!”

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A young lesbian goes to her gynecologist for her yearly pelvic examination. She puts on the paper gown and awaits him to come into the exam room. He instructs her to get up onto the table and place her feet in the stirrups.


As he is examining her she hears him saying, “Hmmmmm… hmmmhmmm…”


He completes the examination, instructs her to dress and then meet him in his office when she is done.


In his office she asks him if there was anything unusual that he observed during the exam because she could not help but hear his non-verbal comments.


“Oh, that!” he says. “I was just admiring you. You have the cleanest vagi

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A man longs to wed a maiden with her virtue intact. He searches for one but resigns himself to the fact that every female over the age of 10 in his town has been at it.


Finally he decides to adopts a baby girl from the orphanage. He raises her until she is walking and talking and then sends her away to a monastery for safekeeping until marrying age. After many years she finally reaches maturity and he retrieves her from the monastery and marries her.


After the wedding they make their way back to his house and into the bedroom where they both prepare themselves for the consummation. They lie down together in his bed and he reaches over for a jar of petr

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