Category Archives: Adult Jokes

Banta bought a new r ….

Banta bought a new rifle and he was too excited. So, he went bear hunting. He spotted a small brown bear and shot it. There was then a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear.

The black bear said: “You`ve got two choices. I either maul you to death or we have rough sex.”

Banta decided to bend over.

Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Banta soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip where he found the black bear and shot it.

There was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him.

The grizzly said: “That was a huge mistake, Banta. You`ve got

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Bill Clinton and Al ….

Bill Clinton and Al Gore were riding down a country road. Bill happened to look out the window and seen a goat with his head stuck in the fence. Bill hollers at the driver to stop the car. As the car stops Bill leans over and tells Al that he would be right back and then jumps out of the car. He runs up to the goat, drops his pants, and screws the goat for about ten minutes. As Bill walks back to the limo, he sees Al staring at the goat.
Al asks, “That looks like fun, can I try?”
Bill said sure and Al jumped out of the limo, dropped his pants, and stuck his head into the fence.

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The funeral parlor c ….

The funeral parlor called the 85 year old widow to tell her that her 90 year old husband had died with such a massive erection that he could not close the lid of the coffin. He had never seen such seen such a big pecker.


Well she said, “Cut it off as close to his body as you can then put it up his ass”.


The next day the whole family arrived at the funeral home to pay their respects and the widow knelt down near her departed husband and noticed there was a tear coming down his cheek.


She leaned over and whispered in his ear, “I told you it hurt you old fucker!”

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A couple was golfing ….

A couple was golfing one day on a Very Exclusive golf course lined with million dollar houses. On the third tee, the husband said, “Honey, be very careful when you drive the ball, do not knock out any windows. It will cost us a fortune to fix.”

The wife teed up and shanked it right through the window of the biggest house on the course.

The husband cringed and said, “I told you to watch out for the houses. All right, let s go up there, apologize and see how much it s going to cost us.”

They walked up and knocked on the door, and heard a voice say, “Come on in.”

When they opened the door they saw glass all over the place and a broken bottl

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