Category Archives: Jokes

The 5 Stages of Drun ….

The 5 Stages of Drunkenness


Stage 1 – SMART: This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known Universe. You know you know everything and want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always RIGHT. And of course the person you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an interesting argument when both parties are SMART.


Stage 2 – GOOD LOOKING: This is when you realize that you are the BEST LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still SMART, so you can talk t

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Bob, a 50 year old e ….

Bob, a 50 year old extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25 year-old blonde who knocks everyone’s socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm. She hangs on Bob’s arm and listens intently to his every word.


His buddies at the club are all envious. They corner him and ask, “Bob, how’d you get the trophy girlfriend?”


Bob replies, “Girlfriend? She’s my wife!”


They’re knocked over, but continue to ask. “So, how’d you persuade her to marry you?”


Bob says, “I lied about my age.”


His friends are fascinated, “What do you mean? Did you

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Bob was in trouble. ….

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed.


She told him, “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!”


The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.


Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house.


She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.


Bob has been missing since Friday.

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